Rules of Hanging Out #3: Go ahead and have some fun (you won’t get fired/kicked out of school/broken up with/ evicted)

On this day I was supposed to go get my taxes done but the universe said "Fuck it!" and I did.  Rarely in New York does my life allow me the privilege of just bopping around for a day and I was not going to pass this up.  Plus my good buddy and PIC (partner in crime-a topic to be discussed later) Adee was visiting and we could all be dead tomorrow so let's make the best of it eh?   We started the day off with some breakfast at my house and then a pleasantly warm and sunny walk over to the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens.  On the way grabbing ice coffees and I a cigarette which made me so happy that I stopped  walking and almost knelt on the side walk and prayed out loud to the creator to feel free to take me right in this moment because there was no way I could feel any better and I was satisfied.  Finally getting to the gardens (Tuesday is their free day by the way) Adee and I  as usual found ourselves laying in the grass mid rose garden staring at our surroundings, feeling the earth beneath us, pondering our existence in this realm and feeling refreshed.

Afterwards we headed up to Harlem to meet up with our friend Anna Luisa who had let us know about a work shop for teaching artists at the Studio Museum.  The Studio Museum is one of my favorite places in NYC and I was long over due for a visit.  The workshop was designed to provide project ideas for folks who work with young people and art related programs, which all three of us have done in the past.  The art project they had us do was making 45 album covers bearing in mind the theme of  "the soundtrack to your life".  It was really adorable to sit in a room doing an art project with all adults especially when everyone went around the room, sharing what they had produced and their fucking feelings! The whole experience really made me miss working with young people, it has been some years BUT afterwards a woman approached me about speaking with some students at her medical high school in Canarsie about the work I do.  Now that I am not a grad student, I am really trying to build meaningful connections in New York so it becomes home/community for me and my future life here that I am constructing in my head.  Which I realise sounds grossly sentimental when said out loud but it's true.  I am really looking forward to visiting the high school and all goes to show that it pays to hang out!

Our record covers

Two weeks after this good day I am finally going to go get my taxes done.  Is there some sort of late fee? I don't know and don't really care because in the end it will be okay.  I am not preaching irresponsibility (because I think having a sense of responsibility shows character) but a sense of balance and wisdom (also displays of character).  We all have things that need to get done and I know generally accepted wisdom dictates - "Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today", however this must be applied to general good times as well not just tasks, errands and work.  Now go call in sick to something!

Hang Out Type: Disaster!!

Safety crouch for tornadoes

I am a big fan of disaster preparedness and it largely came from my own experiences going through a category 5 hurricane in Pensacola Florida, which is why my good friend, Matt Runkle interviewed me for his series The Business of Staying Alive on his blog.  To correspond with that chat I wanted to talk about hanging - disaster.

One of my favorite moments in disaster hanging was during school in the  seventh grade while waiting for tornado sirens to sound at which point we were all trained to run quickly to the hallways to get into our safe positions. In the interim some genius on the staff thought it was a good moment for us to all watch Romeo and Juliet (1968).  Nothing will make a bunch of twelve year olds hornier than watching a tale of teenage rebellion in love and lust while awaiting their impending death by high speed winds.  My 7th grade boy friend at the time, held my hand through out the whole movie and our palms made a sweaty ass mess with the anxiety we were feeling and because it was really muggy and hot. I think they would turn off the AC every time a tornado was on its way and let me tell you in a school full of pubescence turning off the AC is no joke!  I mostly remember just fantasizing about my future in banging it out like the protagonists in the movie but the boyfriend was clearly operating on a much deeper emotional level.  At the end of the movie he turned to me very somberly and staring dead into my face said, "Tina-I need you to know right now that I love you".   I think I smirked at his vulnerability, laughed a little and said "alrighty" which is not too far off from how I react when someone tells me they love me now, because I think they are drunk, lying or just confused.  The tornado came and while we had all enjoyed the day of no work - when the sirens finally sounded the halls were eerily quiet as we crouched against the walls, listening to each other's breathing and the truly train like sounds of the tornado.

Flash forward about twelve years to me waiting out Hurricane Ivan in Pensacola, with me and my roommates cuddled up into the hallway that ran the center of our house with a mattress blocking the entrance to guard us against any flying debris if it should come down to it.  My boyfriend at the time was not trying to convey to me how much he loved me in case of death but rather kept begging me to shut up with the jokes already so that he could sleep out the hurricane.  Fair enough.  But my roommate Paul and I were engrossed in the play by play hurricane being broad casted on the radio and for some reason thought the reports scary yet slightly hilarious and spent most the night giggling in a corner.   With our battery powered radio, some water and a few snacks we waited out the night.  Besides a torn awning our house survived the storm really well.  I can't say the same for my neighbors, one of which had completely lost their roof.  The news focuses on storms as if it is this isolated moment in time where everything exists after the storm the way it was before but that is never the case, things always change. The weeks after the storm was eye opening in how the world truly exists when you and your neighbors are meeting up every day at the back of an army truck to receive rations of food and water.   Much of the time everyone spent the few weeks after Hurricane Ivan with no water and electricity, centered around helping out neighbors and friends with any clean up they needed and the sharing of supplies so everyone was getting by comfortably enough.  The punk owned and run coffee shop I worked at at the time stayed open largely due to the dedication of my good friend Scotty.  There was enough amenities to pull off making coffee and he dutifully sat out in front of the coffee shop for days dispersing cups of joe for donation.  His effort in creating a sense of normalcy in a tumultuous moment I thought sacred and was much appreciated by neighbors and passers by, as a place to stop, share stories and offer support.

So the rules, the rules.  Like in all moments in life where you can anticipate stress try to remember
1) It's not that serious- you will make it through.  Humor is invaluable.  2) Don't get dramatic, let's keep it together no? There is going to be a lot of work to do after the storm.  3) But also take care of yourself and run through any emotions you're having, they are legit. 4) Like any other time period in your life, take time to relax and enjoy the company of your friends and yourself.

Here is the Center for Disease Control's web page on disaster preparedness , don't let it make you crazy, just let it make you aware.

Interview of yours truly by artist and writer Matt Runkle!

Matt likes to talk about survival, I like to talk about survival, read us talking about it together. It's love!

Matt Runkle: The Business of Staying Alive.4: Hanging Out with ...: Gloria Diaz is a girl who knows how to hang out. Over at her blog, Eat-It-All: The Art of Hanging Out , she tells you how to act. One of ...

Rules of Hanging Out #2: Fake It Til You Make It

"Are you looking forward to this weekend?"- the very tall, bespectacled boy asked me, while he continued to bag my groceries.  I was feeling content this evening, buying food for the weekend and the young happy go lucky employees of this Downtown Brooklyn health food store were making me smile.

"Honestly- not really I have to work. How bout yourself?" He paused with my response and looked at me then continued bagging and I wasn't sure if he was pleased or disappointed in my answer.  He says, "Yes.  Because it's supposed to rain."  "Ah kindred spirit", I thought and then we shared how we were kinda bummed that it did not snow more this winter because we enjoy using snow as an excuse for our reclusive natures.  

I get it.  I really do.  Sometimes you just don't want to be around people. You just can't attend one more family event where the conversation revolves around whose kid did what.  Or you can't hang out with your friends and try to respond to the question "What's up? How've you been?" yet again because what you have been up to is weird out of context or too hard to explain and it just falls like a dud into space.  These explanations of what everyone has been doing can begin to sound like boring laundry lists of activities that everyone is spinning in as we tick off the minutes to our certain death.  I fucking get it.  BUT remember those days you force yourself to hang out and you actually see something cool and you actually meet someone cool and you maybe even actually feel some spark in your chest that reminds you that you are indeed happy to be alive.   

Fake it till you make it.  Just sometimes you have to.  To maintain those bonds with people, friends , family, humanity, upholding your end of the bargain of existing on this earth as a human being.  

Hang Out Type: Cultural-Art

Recently (yesterday) when I stopped to assess how I was spending my time once again, I realized that on a fairly regular basis my time consists of looking at art.  With art sometimes I am pleasantly surprised, sometimes deeply inspired and sometimes muttering under my breath "fer crissakes" because I am in the midst of some boring art in a room full of janky people.  Focusing on the positive, just wanted to share some of the visual art I have come across in the last few months that I have really liked.

Watts Towers constructed by Simon Rodia. Los Angeles, December 2011.

My LA Crew: Alee, Mikey, Some guy, Wadala

The Ungovernables (group show).  New Museum. New York City.  April 2012. Really enjoyed most of the exhibit but my favorite piece by far was the film "Jewel"  by Hassan Kahn. I could have watched it at least five more times and am regretting that I didn't. Might go back.  I finally found a decent recording of it on the interweb and wanted to share it.

4000 Disparos/4000 Shots. Jonathas de Andrade.

 

Dias en que todo es verdad (a small portion of the installation). Mariana Telleria.

Paintings by Lynette Yiadom Boakye. 2011

  Essential Hues (group show) at Wayfarers Gallery. Bed-Stuy, NYC.  April 2012.

Altar of painted shells by Anna Luisa

Art work by Caitlan Rose Sweet. Loved it!

Altar and art work by Caroline Paquita

Poster art by Mother Popcorn

                                   

Poster art by Caroline Paquita.

Art work by Adee Roberson

 

Happy Men

Nearly every morning I am given the gift of interacting with Marcel (land lord's hubby) and with an older Muslim man who watches the car lot on my block.  They are such beautiful happy men and every day they smile at me and remind me to have a beautiful day.  We always have very simple exchanges but in their happiness and wisdom I am always positive they are here to provide me some sound advice.  Yesterday talking on the stoop with Marcel I saw the bus I usually catch quickly arriving and leaped off the steps, "That's my bus Marcel! I am gonna run and catch it!" I just felt like running because it's fun but Marcel yells out after me, "Don't rush Gloria! There is always a next one!". Another deep life lesson from Marcel, I am sure of it.

The older Muslim man was playing "Chan Chan" in the car lot today and it made me glad. Carib-Latino music always pierces me right in my throat, down to my stomach, making my mouth water and my belly queasy like I have a crush, falling in love.  It triggers my memories of my life at home when I was four, which is when I am sure I was my truest self.  

Pesach/Good Friday

You can hear a pin drop in my place of work today because it would appear that most folks have decided to take Passover(aka Pesach)/Good Friday off.  I was laughing with my friend Ayana the other day about how I continue to be surprised by how religiously observant the (heathen) City of New York is, people skipping work and kids missing school. The only religious holiday as a kid I even got close to missing was Three Kings Day (Dia de los Reyes) and that was a rarity.  Here in NYC kids being absent for Three Kings is no biggie and there is a parade and other festivities.  Every other Xtian Puerto Rican kid through out the continental US is playing hookie, including my 20 mini cousins in Buffalo, NY who spend the day being ploughed with candy and toys while they lazily lay around or play with one another. 

Delicious Matzoh Ball Soup prepared by the hostess.

About seven shots into a Manischewitz off.

I am going to a Passover Seder this evening with two trusted spirit questing friends whose time hanging out together as of late has been mostly spent exploring our more mystical, spiritual, cultural sides.  It is only my second Seder and my first in nearly ten years.  The first one I ever attended was in jail having been arrested for participating in the IMF/WTO A17 protests in DC.  Part instinctual , part crazy, part curious (despite having already been arrested for protesting) I had decided to cross the (police) line therefore spending the next five days in jail with about 300 hundred of my closest friends.  Our cohort occupied an entire wing of the jail and the chiller of the group spent most the time napping, playing games, and watching The Simpson's. When it was announced at our daily meeting that there was to be a Seder one evening to celebrate Passover I was in, since I am way into rituals and learning new things. I sat quietly on the floor of a jail house indoor basketball court watching the ritual involved in Seder go down, secretly impressed with the dedication of my fellow jail mates in making it happen. As of late I have been focusing on studying monotheistic religions, specifically at this point and time Judaism, and hit up the Passover knowledge hard in preparation for this week. I have never been the typical punk in regards to subscribing to atheism or wanting to murder Jesus/God.  While being able to recognize the oppressive and brutal forces religious order has brought on humanity, I am also able to appreciate the internal peace it can bring to one's life-not in a restrictive way but with occasional reminders to stop for a second and reflect on varying aspects of your life and to work on altering them for the better (when I say religion I mean any spiritual practice really that one adheres to, from Islam to moon cycles).

Just making sure Leah is not skimping.

This year, I am really into Passover for its theme of celebrating the Exodus of the Israelites from Egypt (ending their enslavement) and extending that concept to your life in this moment and time.  Release yourself from whatever enslaves you be it physical, mental or spiritual. Happy Pesach or whatever you are up to tonight.

*Life Side Note: The dinner was great and what started off as a religiously thoughtful evening ended in me being a lil tipsy.  The hostess challenged me to drink basically an entire bottle of grape flavored Manishewitz with her via shots, which I pulled off without a hitch.